As I suggested last week, this chapter is pretty much just Angel talking on the phone. If it helps, you can imagine that other, more interesting things are happening in the background. Perhaps dancing manatees are involved. Or ninjas. Who doesn’t love a ninja?
In other news … my love … for ellipses … is … overwhelmingly obvious … in … this chapter.
Chapter 56: The Other Half (part II)
When Angel looked at her answering machine, her heart fluttered … there were four messages. Maybe he had called?
“Angel? This is Dustin. Look … just call me as soon as you get this.”
“Angel … this is Scott. Give me a ring when you can.”
“Angel … Dustin again. Please call me soon. I’m worried about you.”
And then …
“Hey there Angel. I don’t know if you remember me or not, but I’m betting that you do. You lost at tic tac toe to a handsome stranger … that handsome stranger was me. [that is so smooth I can barely stand it. Fellas, take notes]. Anyway …. I’d love to hang out again. I’ll call you later.”
Angel barely prevented herself from squealing. He had called. And he said he’d call later! When the phone rang again, she was so excited that she forgot to see what it was.
“Hello?”
“Angel? I’m so glad I finally caught you!”
“Oh … hey Dustin. What’s up?” [cue the manatees!]
“Angel … about the other night …”
“Dustin. I know you’re just looking out for me … but I’m a grown woman.”
“I know, I know … but he’s bad news.” [bad news? Who talks like that?]
“So what?”
“He’s not your type, darlin’.”
“Maybe I shouldn’t have a type, Dustin. Maybe I should just have a good time hanging out with Jeff.”
“He’s just … he’s a bad sort. Our partying all the time, going through women like water … he’s no gentleman.” [no, seriously: who talks like that?]
“Dustin … do you know how many gentlemen turn out to be scumbags? I’ve dated enough nice guys to know that they break your heart too. So if I know Jeff is a jerk to begin with, which I don’t even actually know, maybe that’s to my ultimate advantage.”
“Angel …”
“I have to go, Dustin. Have a nice night.” [won’t she see him later? Doesn’t she, you know, work with him?]
Angel hung up the phone before he could reply or protest. She knew her friend meant well, but the absolute last thing she watned to do right now was get love advice from Dustin Rhodes.
The phone rang again … it was Jeff. Angel took a deep breath and answered it.
“Hello?”
“Hey pretty lady.” [cue the ninjas!]
“Hey smooth talker.”
“So I think we should hang out.”
“Me too. “
“Excellent. I’m in town for three more nights.” [what kind of wrestling card lasts three nights?!?]
“We’d better not waste any time then.”
“I agree. I’ll pick you up at seven.” [wait … when is he going to wrestle?]
“See you then, Jeff.”
“Later, Angel.”
Angel hung up the phone and sunk into the couch [in her hotel room? Does she have a suite? Or are we suddenly back in her apartment again?] Seven! What should she wear? Three more nights? And then what? But she couldn’t allow herself to worry about that now. Jeff Hardy wasn’t about the future, he was about now. And now she had to go get something to wear. [why not just wear your outfit from Sting’s party? That was a hit!]
NOTES
1) When was the last time Angel did anything related to her job? Or, for that matter, anyone wrestled?
2) I wonder what Scott wanted. Maybe to let Angel know that he’s in town, seeing as how Jeff is there. Scott is supposedly still in the WWF, which is of course where Jeff is. Yeah, my wrestling chronology is completely screwed up. I obviously wanted to introduce Jeff, but in doing so, needed to conveniently ignore the fact that 6 years of wrestling storylines and brand switches have elapsed. Hooray for artistic license!
3) Sort of hanging up on Dustin is the least lame thing Angel has ever done.
COMING UP NEXT …
Angel buys underwear. Oh man. I’m sooooo sorry about this. And then she goes on a date with Jeff. If you’ve got the intestinal fortitude [tm Gorilla Monsoon], tune in next week for …
Chapter 57: One Night
2 comments:
I think we should make a drinking game out of your promiscuous use of ellipses. You can be drinking ginger ale, Slice will take cranberry vodka, and I will stick with beer. In other news: I hope you are wearing crazy hats for halloween.
A drinking game based on my use of ellipses would result in hospitalization. Even if you use ginger ale.
For Halloween, I went as me in high school. No hats were involved, but I did wear a lot of glitter makeup, which I suppose I thought was the epitome of class.
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