Chapter 30: Something's on His Mind

Welcome back, friends. Today we get a blissfully short interaction between Chris and Bobby that once again includes a reference to showering and a deepening of the relationship between Dustin and Angel that includes injured toes. I humbly submit to you:

Chapter 30: Something’s on His Mind

“Hey Bob,” Chris greeted, toweling off his hair.

“Hi,” Bobby murmured, lacing his boots.

“You looked great against Johnny B. Badd,” said Chris.

“Thanks,” muttered Bobby without looking up.

“Something up, Bob?”

“Naw. I gotta go.”

“Bye.”

Chris shrugged and finished drying off his hair. Sometimes Bobby was a bit secretive, and that was okay.

---
“Ouch!” Angel cried, rubbing her toe.

“Sorry,” Dustin apologized. “I really do appreciate this, Angel.”

“No problem.”

Angel was teaching Dustin to dance in preparation for his wedding, a mere two and a half weeks away. [Isn’t this something he should be doing with his freaking fiancé?]

“Let’s take a break, huh?”

“Sure.”

Both plopped down on the couch. Angel removed her shoes and examined her toes.

“Did I hurt you?”

“Nothing reconstructive service can’t fix,” [sic] she chuckled.

There was a moment of silence as Dustin stared into space and Angel put her shoe back on.

“What’re you thinking about, Dustin?”

“You and Alex. You’re both so similar, but so different.” [how does that even make sense? Also, shut up, Dustin. Go hang out with your wife.]

“How so?”

“Your personalities are kinda the same, but I feel so different about you two. I mean, I love you both, I would do anything for either of you, but it’s still different.”

“I understand what you’re saying.”

“I can’t imagine ever being able to cry on Alex’s shoulder like I did with you.”

“You can’t?”

Dustin shook his head. [uhm … that’s weird, buckaroo.]

“Hey Angel?”

“Yeah?”

“What was bugging you that day a while back?”

“Oh. I had just gotten into a fight with Chris. Why do you ask?”

“Just wondering.”

“You nervous about your wedding?”

“Hell yeah.”

“Where’s the honeymoon?”

“Tahiti.”

“Sounds nice.”

“Yeah.”

“Dustin, this will be a personal question, and I understand if you don’t want to answer it, but, will your honeymoon be the first time you and Alexandra ever had sex?”

“No. Why?”


“Just wondering.”

“Have you and Chris ever had sex.”

“No. I’m … a virgin.”

“Serious?”

“Yeah. You seem surprised.”

“I am.”

Angel’s clock struck six.

“I’d better go.” Dustin announced, rising from the couch. “Match starts soon.” [now the matches are at night?]

“Okay,” said Angel, following him to the door.

“Thanks again.”

“Anytime.”

Dustin kissed Angel on the cheek and stepped into the cold Minnesota night. His stomach began to launch into a series of somersaults as he thought of how close his wedding was. He shivered and zipped his coat up to his chin.


NOTES:

1) The title of this chapter is an oblique reference to a ridiculously obscure 4 Seasons song. How obscure? It’s a track from their Genuine Imitation Life Gazette album, which I think maybe six people worldwide have heard of besides me. I still have the tape. It’s also supposed to be a reference to Bobby’s internal struggle, which I forgot to elaborate on in this chapter.

2) Johnny B. Badd! Like Little Richard, only somehow more flamboyant. Look at this outfit!

3) Dustin and Angel (Dungel?). Where do I begin. Ok, I’ll start with the obvious. This combination of private dancing, cheek-kissing, and intense emotional closeness between two adult “just friends” who are married and/or exclusively dating other people is really inappropriate. That being said: one of my very best friends is a guy. We are such good friends that he came to my wedding dressed as a Viking. I love this dude and would do anything for him, much as the way Dustin loves Angel. Unlike Dungel, however, the scenario in this chapter would never, ever happen between me and The Viking. The closest we’ve ever come to kissing is me kicking him in the face (this happened a lot in college. Amy, you understand. Also, I think I kicked your husband in the face a lot too. Sorry if that was crossing some sort of boundary). Anyhoo, where was I? Oh yes. So The Viking and I have been BFF for about 10 years. I think he’s seen my cry once. And it was really weird. Slice has seen me cry plenty of times. And it’s never weird. And if I thought for a second that he’d feel weird crying around me, but not around some ladyfriend of his, I’d haul us in to the marriage counselor, because something ain’t right with that.

Aside from that, this here Dungel interaction is kind of interesting in terms of subtext. It’s rather obvious that Dustin and Angel are totally into each other. Aside from the aforementioned dancing and cheeking, she’s asking him about sex and he’s confessing a level of emotional insecurity between him and Alex. And after the dance lesson, we see Dustin more nervous than ever about his impending wedding (to the point where he’s shivering), perhaps because it’s to the wrong woman.

If I thought for a second that I did any of this intentionally, I’d be kind of impressed with 13-year-old me. Alas. I’m pretty sure that in my mind, Dustin’s nerves were the stereotypical “wedding jitters” I assumed everyone went through, the shivering was because it was cold, the sex-talk was to reestablish Angel’s Virtue, and the weird Dungel closeness was something any man could achieve with Angel, because she was just the most wonderful, compassionate, loving woman EVER.

Gak.

Well then … I think I’ve done enough rambling for now. Let’s see what’s on tap for next week:

Ooh … you’re not going to want to miss this one. We get to meet a new (?) character and watch Bobby brood. Plus you get the punchline of one of my favorite jokes. Whee! Join us next time for …

Chapter 31: Revenge Begins